Hello Cherished Friends!
This past weekend I attended a women’s conference with several close friends. I went to the conference hoping to receive something specifically from God for me. And as it goes with God, I received way more than I ever imagined I would. Let me give you some back-story…
Many of you know, as I’ve written about before, that I was pregnant two years ago and then shortly after had a miscarriage. I’ve been praying and believing for babies ever since, and still have not been able to get pregnant again. During this time, I’ve had pastors and speakers pray over me and over my belly for babies. My friends have stood with me and prayed for me. I have one friend that hugs me and then speaks prophetically to my belly…every time she sees me.
There are many people standing in complete faith with me…believing with me…praying with me. Me. And yet, even with all of that, I still lost hope in believing that having babies would ever happen…for me.
By the time I left for this conference a few days ago, I felt like I was drifting and broken. Mother’s Day is coming up and it’s been a hard day for me to endure, especially in the past couple of years. I believe the anticipation of this upcoming day and all that it entails, sent my brokenness on a downward spiral. I was headed to a dark place. And then I attended the first night of the conference. The theme of this conference: LIGHT. Here are a few tidbits I received the first night:
- God knows my name
- God can speak to me in the midst of a crowd
- Light wants to reveal the dark places…not to shame me, but to free me
- God’s light sets me free
At the end of this message, the altar was opened for anyone needing prayer on specific things. I boldly walked down to the front and shared with a complete stranger what I shared with you above.
After the service ended and we were back in our hotel room, I openly shared with my friends all that I had been feeling and what I had experienced the first night through the message and prayer time. My friends were very encouraging to me. We talked for a while about my struggle, how I can overcome it and ways to renew my faith in God for the babies that I’ve been praying for.
The next day, there were two incredibly powerful speakers in the morning session and I believe both of them were speaking right to me. Here are some of the nuggets from the first morning session:
- Sometimes God’s promises take time and all of my trust
- God will go to great lengths so that I will see the fulfillment of His promises to me
- My purpose is to daily walk in humble obedience to God and His dream for my life
- I have to be okay in the season I’m in to be most effective
- I have to resist the urge to look to the right and to the left at what others have
- My heart has to be pure toward God so He can use me in the most effective way
And in the second morning session:
- Never fall in love with your place of provision, otherwise it will become an idol; fall in love with the Provider
- Every time God builds my faith, He takes me there in baby steps
- Provision will never make me a believer; only the resurrection will
I felt through each of these tidbits of messages that God was speaking directly to my heart to show His faithfulness to me. He was telling me that He had never left my side and even though I was beginning to give up on my dream to be a mother, He never did! And He never will!
During the discussion in our room the previous night, one of my friends proposed an idea. This idea is a visible and sacrificial way, not just for me to stand in faith, but for the three of them to stand in faith with me in believing for my babies. She proposed a fast for the four of us. From there, the idea expanded to see if any other friends would be interested in fasting with us to stand in faith and believe for babies for me. Here are the details of the fast:
Starting date: Monday, May 4
Ending date: Monday, May 25
Length of fast: 21 days
What to fast: anything you’re willing to sacrifice for 21 days (food or non-food)
Purpose: to stand in faith with me (Kara) to become pregnant in 2015 with my heart’s desire for three baby boys (James Curtis, Andrew Patrick and Zachary <middle name TBD>)
If you’d be interested and willing to fast for me, alongside us, would you please leave a comment and let me know. There’s no obligation of any kind to agree and take up this cause. But if you’d be willing to do so, I’d love to know that you’re on board with us and standing and believing in faith with me.
“Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works within us…” Ephesians 3:20
“…in the presence of Him whom he believed—God, who gives life to the dead and calls those things which do not exist as though they did…” Romans 4:17